Wednesday, April 3, 2013

looking for a meaningful life and spring for that matter.

Spring was here then spring was gone then it nicely came back again only to go away again. Spring what a fickle beast you are. Hopefully if the weather report is correct Spring should show back up later in the week. Thank goodness because I feel like its February again and being the stubborn mule I am starting on April 1st I have refused to wear a coat.

I have been reading Walden maybe for the first time but probably not I took "Nature in American Literature" twice in college because I failed it the first time (not for lack of understanding mind you more for a lack of not doing one presentation) and someone erroneously told me that if you take it again and do well it will wipe out the F. Um not so much both times I took it remained on my transcript and I had to sit through the class twice. Argh. But anyway re-reading it now and this quote I thought summed up spring just right.

"They were pleasant spring days, in which the winter of man's discontent was thawing as well as the earth, and the life that had lain torpid began to stretch itself."

I already feel like I am behind farming wise but I was smart this year I padded the dates I needed to get things seeded by and it turns out that I am on time for most early for some and late on a few. Funny when you learn how to trick yourself. I have 9 flats to seed when I get home hopefully I will have the energy but I will probably get some done today and the rest over the next few days. But all should be well. Hopefully if the weather turns warmer and the ground dries out we can actually get dirty soon. Can't wait! I love the smell of dirt. Hell I even like the smell of manure although I prefer horse to cow. Too much information? Perhaps.

I have been thinking a lot lately on a slightly deeper level than usual mainly thanks to a wonderful blog I started reading a few months back written by Jon Katz if you don't read it add it to your list he talks about things that every human should give some time to thinking about. His website is In addition to being a fine writer his photography is pretty amazing and has inspired me to take more photos which is something I enjoy doing and a good creative outlet for me. Funny I took some picture of the dogs the other day and my husband looked at them and said wow you have changed these are amazing and I replied you know what the difference is? I tried. Interesting. So check Jon out it might make a difference in your life like it has mine.

One of the things he talks about is leading a meaningful life. Being an atheist and being pretty sure that this life is the only one I am going to get a crack at I need to start living my life with more meaning. Starting the farm has helped because growing things not only makes me happy but it give me a lot of self worth and makes me feel like I am part of a solution to a problem instead of just part of the problem. Here is another quote that pretty much sums up why I want to grow food.

The greatest change we need to make is from consumption to production, even if on a small scale, in our own gardens. If only 10% of us do this, there is enough for everyone. Hence the futility of revolutionaries who have no gardens, who depend on the very system they attack, and who produce words and bullets, not food and shelter. - Bill Mollison

I still have A LOT of work to do in moving towards a more meaningful life and a big part of that I think for me will be finding outlets for my creativity. Unfortunately I still have an off-farm job and probably will for quite awhile so its important for me I think to find things that fulfill me on a creative level since I spend my days talking about paper. Not the worst thing to talk about but not the most fulfilling. I think this blog helps channel many of the thoughts that ramble around in my head and is almost in some ways like therapy. Taking photographs and needlework also adds to the puzzle. Funny there have two times I have consulted a physic and both times they told me I needed to do something creative with my life. Well I have yet to listen 100% but I am getting there. One thing I am really getting in touch is that life seriously is a journey and the path is the goal (to borrow from the Buddha) and we cant stop learning and growing at any age. If you think you have it all figured out at 30 you have another thing coming because you might have hopefully figured out a thing or two but you don't even know what you are going to have to figure out later so just relax and look forward to the challenge.


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